On starting again
Some things feel like second nature. They come easy to you, like breathing.
It can be what you do at work. It can be running. Or a relationship. You don’t even think about it. It is a part of you. But then... life gets in the way, and you skip a beat. You miss one day. No biggie, right? And then it throws you another curveball, and you miss another one. And before you even notice, days turn into weeks, and weeks turn into months.
Suddenly you can barely remember how it feels to do it at all. Doubt starts creeping in. Guilt. Shame. What once was a tiny gap now feels like a void with no bottom in sight.
“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.”
Starting over is difficult. Throughout all the months I have been silent on here, I kept thinking about why that is. Is it the fear of failure? Or is it perhaps that since you already know how much effort it takes, you just seriously don’t wanna do it all over again anymore? Or does it just feel easier to say, “eh, well, it wasn’t that important anyway,” even if it was?
I think it doesn’t really matter whether it’s starting to work again after a break, making life work again after a breakup, or just making yourself work out. What once felt easy now feels like this crazy heavy load, and you’re not even sure if you still have it in you. Any attempt looks pale compared to what you once had, and when you imagine the journey you need to go through AGAIN to get there, it feels unbearable.
Everyone has been there at least once, right? Or is that just me?
You know what they say – never be afraid to start over. This time you are not starting from scratch; you’re starting from experience. And without rambling about how I believe summoning the will to try again is not only hard but also brave, I’ll just say one thing. Whatever your goal is, you will only get closer to it if you try, not if you don’t. As simple and as complicated as it is, that is all. Thanks for coming to my potato ted talk. 😊
And… here I am. Starting again. From experience, both on and off the page. So, let’s see how it goes! And if you read this far - thank you for being on this journey with me. :)
“I have a very easy way to tell you whether you know you’re doing the right thing in life. You can’t not do it. It is not possible.”
